Hi, I'm Stine!
And this is a part of my story...
Some years ago I hit a brick wall,
or at least that's what it felt like.
I was done, my heart and soul felt broken. My massive energy was gone, my body wasn't able to keep up or do anything at all. My gut was out of order. I had days I couldn't stop crying and days I just wanted to sleep. The amount of physical stress and tension in my body was so bad that my chiropractor asked for permission to talk to my doctor, about me NOT going back to work.
I ended up on sick leave from work, feeling burnt out.
But how did I end up there? At the age of 27?
To be honest I don't know exactly how, but here's some of what I've figured out: I had been running from work in a leader position to cheerleading practice, having 12-14 hours out the door several days a week for some years. Wearing and tearing on my body. I also know I was struggling with the good old Daddy issues, after losing my dad at the age of 7. Resulting in me making choices that confirmed that I wasn't good enough, I wasn't worth love and men were supposed to leave me.
I also know I kept myself occupied. Running away from a big part of my sorrow and heart ache, after loosing my mum four years prior. My nutrition wasn't there either, between cheer coasts and the long days, I didn't make it a priority. My food budget was low and I wasn't home to cook anyway.
And when did I crash into that famous wall? Almost six months after quitting cheerleading.
It felt like all of a sudden everything I had pressed down, ignored, not prioritized, caught up to me BIG TIME..
I hadn't been taking care of myself mentally, physically or spiritually. And most of all I was missing me, the real true me.
My solution? I had to rebuild myself in all aspects, mentally, physically and spiritually. I meditated, went for walks, did yoga, improved my nutrition step by step, got acupuncture to release stagnant energy and got help to process sorrow. I had to learn to reconnect with my body, mind and soul, so I could start to recognize what did me good and what didn't. Not to mention: so I could listen to my body when it had something to say. I learned to find and talk to my inner voice, told the mean girl to f*** off, and found ways to be my own cheerleader. I had to start the prosess of learning to say no, to not spread myself too thin. And so much more.
To this day I still make mistakes. I sometimes give to many yeses, and my body can scream or stop me if I havn't been listening. I have times i feel low and not good enough. I'm still guarded, not letting everyone in and sometimes it takes time. But now I got tools to help. I know what to do. I bounce back faster. And the mean girl in my head, she can still show up, but rarely. And when she does, we usually talk it out over a cup of coffee.
